Europe 102: A glimpse of an Ancient City

When in Rome... you roam. :) My friend says that you can see more of the city by walking. I have never really understand this not until I get to Europe where almost everyone just walks. And Rome is not something special. Getting around the city of Rome, you would definitely see that it's modern. Well, modern than my small city but somehow sets you in a movie like you were 2000 years ago where gladiators and chariots rule the streets. Since I haven't really done research that much, I mostly rely on the our travel book. Here are five (5) highlights which I think you must not miss when you are in Rome (in no particular order except mine).

St. Peter's Basilica and Square

From the outside, the dome of St. Peter's Basilica

Well, it's technically, not part of Rome but there's no missing this biggest basilica in the world. When, we first got into the square. I knew it was big but I never KNEW it was THAT big. From afar, you might just consider it just like any other churches. But since I have been to the basilica in Florence (the third largest), I'm got more curious of what “largest” mean... and man, IT IS large. You can imagine its vastness when you see how people looked tinny bit tiny compared to the church. And once inside, you would feel dwarfed beside the sculptures. Not even close to a hobbit with the elves. They looked more like Titan sculptures. Aside from its vastness, the treasure of this place also lies in the works of Michaelangelo from the sculptures to the dome ceiling. I'm not a fan of the Renaissance art but for some reasons which I can't remember, I do recognize Pieta. But since I'm not a fan, I didn't know that it was by Michaelangelo (and he did it when he's 25!). It is also best to really take some time and appreciate his artistic work at the cupola. Just be ready with a stiff neck.

A view of St. Peter's Square from the dome

And since you are already there, you can also get up to the dome to see the view of the square from the top of St. Peter's church. Tip: Go there in the afternoon so that you can take a picture of the view with the day and night mode. There are a lot of beautiful and historic churches in Rome. A 10-minute walk from St. Peters, you can already visit Castel Angelo (very famous from Dan Brown's book), St. Ignatius Church, Pantheon, and some others... just continue walking.

Sistine Chapel

The tour to the Sistine Chapel is part of the tours that Vatican Museum offers. Before you get to the chapel, you will be able to see their vast collection of Roman and Greek artifacts which dates back some ancient years ago. From sculptures, to paintings, to tapestry. We love taking funny pictures and the sculptures at the museum did not escape our crazy eyes. They also showcase some modern arts and paintings from different artists. One of my favorite stops at the museum is the gallery of Popes' vehicles from carriages to actual modern cars, a replica (or original?) of the car used when he visited Manila was also showcased there. Another favorite are the huge wall room paintings by Michaelangelo and Rafael. I'm no artist, I can't barely draw something decent but looking at these paintings, I wish I had that talent.

Poor ancient Roman... Fun shot alert! 

The highlight of course of the Vatican Museum tour is the Sistine Chapel. This chapel is very famous because this is where the papal conclave is held. That means aside from the bishops themselves, through generations, the walls and paintings of this chapel are the only ones who knows what really happens when a new Pope is elected. We just look out for the white smoke. Aside from it's historical importance to the Roman Catholic church, the ceiling and altar also contains the most famous work of Michaelangelo. Looking at the ceiling, our guide was right, the only way he would do such work is to work on his back... and he did it for more than 4 years(!) You can identify some of these paintings as scenes from the bible. One of the famous part is The Creation of Adam, the two images of men (depicting Adam & God) reaching out to each other with their fingertips touching. According to our guide, the chapel has been in the stage of restoration of years and has just opened a few months ago. Unfortunately, you can't take any pictures inside, so you just have to stare above. You wish you could just lay down somewhere and appreciate it that way.

Piazza di Spagna

A view from the top of the Spanish steps

This place is basically a home to the Spanish Embassy. There's really nothing special there. But the place with its famous Spanish steps allows tourists and local alike to just chill (not literally) and enjoy the busy streets where galleries and shops reins. After a long walk, this would definitely be like heaven to your feet. At the top of the steps is the Trinita dei Monti church. This is also a great spot to take a top view picture of the steps down to the lighted busy commercial street.

Piazza di Spagna

Will I be back at Rome? :)

Around the city of Rome, you can find piazzas and usually at the centerpiece, a fountain. The largest of all the fountains in Rome is the Trevi Fountain. You can't miss it since it's also a magnet for tourists. And just like every other fountain, coin throwing is also allowed. It is believed that when you throw a coin on this fountain, you will be back in Rome. But no timeline, it could also mean that it applies to your descendants. If not you, your future kids will be able to visit Rome. Aside from coin throwing, you can't also miss the detailed Roman sculptures around the fountain. It is also a great place to sit down and enjoy the beauty of the water and the surrounding architecture. Just look for a spot where your reverie will be interrupted with a couple doing selfies.

Colosseum

The halls of the Colosseum

And last but definitely not the least is the huge remnants of a great ancient city, the Colosseum. This is like the center for entertainment of the Romans. A stadium whose form of entertainment is not football, not baseball...actually, has anything to do with balls. If you watched the Gladiator movie or any other movies with gladiators in it, this is where they held the fights... man versus beasts... man versus man... a fight to death. Thinking about it, maybe these fights are more bloody and the mortality is higher, but I wonder how much difference is it to the UFCs or boxings of today. Although, you can still see men wearing gladiator costume, they are not there to fight but as a spot to take pictures. This place makes you understand a bit about the ancient culture and life. Given the resources that they have then, it's quite amazing to imagine how they were able to build such structure which still stands... after about 2000 years.

There's still more to Rome that I've mentioned above. And if I'm asked to get back to this city again, I would do it in a whim. Well, not exactly.. I have to settled my work and have proper documents. :D But I wouldn't hesitate to be back and discover some other parts that my feet and eyes have missed.

Ciao, Romans! Ciao, Italy! :)

Europe 102: A celebrity Pope, a talented Brother, and an Italian Lady surprise

It's truly Christmas time in the air! It's not just because of the wreaths, lights, made-up Christmas trees, and belens but for Filipinos it's also the consecutive Misa de Gallo (dawn masses) or Simbang Gabi (evening masses). The time to wake up at the crack of dawn to prepare for the mass. It may sound like a torture especially for all those sleepyheads (including me in a no-class day :)). However, I look forward to it everyday because it not only prepare you spiritually for the coming of Christ but it's also a fun bonding for me and my siblings with a super early breakfast. Going to the Vatican City is something that we (me, my family, and maybe majority of the Catholics) would consider a big fulfillment... more so if you can actually see the Pope.

An audience with the Pope

Just one of the excited audience.

After quite an adventure looking for the bronze door, we set off the next day for the Papal audience. Frankly, I don't know what to expect. When I told my sister that I would be able to see the Pope, I was still in disbelieve. I couldn't imagine how easy it was for us to do this considering the 2-weeks notice at the website. We also realized that it was also the Papal audience before Christmas and the last one for the year. Spell lucky. :) I was starting to imagine that it would be like a big mass-like gathering... well, it turns out not exactly.

Securing our tickets with us, we went to the same gate and got in line with the rest of the audience for the security check. The line wasn't that long, I think a blockbuster hit at the cinema would be longer. And the security check are like the ones at the airport. The people were a mix group from Asians, Africans, Europeans/Americans, etc... from priests, nuns, and others with no religious affiliations (like us). The commonality is that you can sense the same feeling of anticipation and excitement. Everyone seem to wear their best smiles (knowingly or unknowingly) except maybe the ones at the security checks.

We finally got beyond the bronze door and went into a huge modern hall where the audience was held. There wasn't any statues or picture of saints which churches usually contains except for a sculpture (I think, of resurrection) at center of the stage. The place was very comfortable and modern... more like a hall where you held concerts or conference rather than religious gathering. (Later on, I found out that the hall is called Pope Paul VI.) I'm not good with assumptions but my partner says that it was about 2000 people there but it doesn't feel crowded at all. In fact, there are still a lot of vacant seats available... maybe the rest just didn't find the trick of the bronze door. ;)

Anyways, we found a seat amongst a group of single men... unfortunately, for my girlfriends, they are bound to be single forever. Well spiritually, more like “In a Relationship” with Christ. These were the fine men of the Legionaries of Christ and one of them is Brother Colin. By the way, we also met a few others and one of them just got ordained this year! So, I just want to give a shoutout greeting of congratulations to Fr. Matthew Schneider! Continue to be an inspiration and a reflection of Christ in today's world.

Well, since we still have no clue what's going to happen, it's quite such a breather to have conversations with Brother Colin. Like being with someone who went to the same concert before, he told us of what to expect.

There he is! (blurred)

When the people started to shout and cheer, we knew that Pope Benedict just came in. If you know nothing about the event, you would probably think that Tom Cruise or some celebrity is in the house (although, some other might also consider the Pope as a celebrity). The cheers was contagious. And that was one of the longest cheer that I have ever witness in a gathering. Maybe second (or same level) to a Backstreet Boys concert with 20K+ audience and 90% female. It was both fascinating and fun and I feel like I'm in a concert and it was just the beginning. After the crowd has been settled, the program started. When the opening prayer started, it still feels surreal for me. I think I was wearing a smile while praying (in Italian). I just realized at that time my item #8.

8. Pray at the Vatican City.. I also want to get a rosary from there for my mom & sis

Although, I just wished to pray at the Vatican, God made it more special by having the Pope lead it with such an excited crowd. (By the way, getting a rosary was easy, they're everywhere! :)) Another entertaining part of the program was when the bishop (as emcee) did a roll call of the organizations from different countries. Every group went to cheer on as their country was called. Germany even have their cheer song. It was really cool. I bet I'll also be cheering and standing if a group from the Philippines were also called. That's how great the mood was. It wasn't that long. About an hour and a half. It only took that long because the Pope gave a Christmas message in a LOT of different languages. And we learned from Brother Colin that it was the first time that he gave a message in Arabic. And when he started saying “blessings to you and your family at home” (not in verbatim), my heart tightened... my home is half-way across the globe... the only thought that came to my mind was that I strongly wished that they were there with me... at least for my mom. I know that they would feel as overwhelmed as I was. Maybe some day, I hope I can bring (some) of them with me.... some day. I went out of the hall feeling grateful... it was a short but meaningful encounter.

A n Italian lunch out with the Brother

With the men in black, Brother Colin and
newly ordained Fr. Matthew Schneider.

We still have conversations with Brother Colin and eventually we decided to have lunch together. He brought us to this traditional Italian restaurant which serves wine(!) for lunch(!). I think wines for Italians are like Coke for Filipinos. The lunch was great... although, I don't know the names of the breads and pizzas that we ate, I just remembered the ambiance. It has a taste of Filipino in it. I guess, the long tables and audible family conversations made it Filipino-ish... also, the owner seems to know everyone in there including Brother Colin. There's not a lot of new people that we met traveling through Europe. So, we truly welcome his company. Anyways, what's the probability of meeting a priest at the Vatican? :D

Mostly people would assume that we will talk about religion... well, part of it is but mostly we talk about us, about people and humanity in general. I was always curious about how or why priests (or nuns) chose a vocation which I think tops the list of service-oriented duties (along with social volunteers). And in all my conversations with seminarians (not a lot), their decisions are not entirely a defined choice by them, nor something of a chance, but also a divine one. His story is not so different. When I was little, I wanted to be a nun because I really like what they wear and they look serene. Soon I found out the reality beyond the uniforms. So, I switched my goal to wanting to be a doctor. Anyways, I forgot to mention that he's also an insanely talented linguistic, who speaks fluently in Italian, German, French, and of course, as an American, English... that's the linguistic part. The talented part is that he also a pianist and plays for concert. Maybe one day we also get to witness that. :)

I think our conversation was as long as the audience with the Pope (maybe longer :D). I never realized that a conversation with a seminarian, a scientist, and an ordinary girl about life and its choices would be that interesting. He invited us to visit Rome again next year in time for his ordination. I hope that the invitation still stands... and I hope that we will have the time and opportunity to be back... and this time, maybe meet Pope Francis :)

My surprise: A Fair Lady... in Italian

I know that my Vatican experience was something for the books. From our adventure with the bronze door to the actual audience. And in between these schedules, the Man was able to pull out another surprise. Prior to this was this. It's quite an exhausting day walking around, so when he said that we have an appointment at 9pm, I was just like “ok.. I just have to rest for a while” after at the apartment. Since he didn't want to mention what the surprise is, he just says something like “Are you not going to change?” And since I'm a bit exhausted... and I also didn't feel like changing... and I don't think I look like a drab with pants and a jacket on. Therefore, with all these reasons, I didn't change my day trip's attire. Little did I know that it was a clue.

We started looking for the place... well, he started looking for the place and I just went with him. And finally we reached the stop. I was like “Are we getting in there?? Are we really watching this?? Oh-my...” On my mind: “This is on my list!” Yes, he plans to check off one of the items on my list, my #6. 

6. Watch opera or musical theater (any Mama Mias?)

English Title... Italian Content  :D

And the play was My Fair Lady. It's one of my wishes to watch an actual musical play. I generally love music and I love Lea Salonga. But the chance of getting to watch anything close to a famous musical play living in Zamboanga City was veryclose to zero. I also enjoyed our theater production back in college... it was one of my college highlights.

Outside, I was in awe just looking at the poster. And super excited. I'm not sure why he chose that play. But if I remembered it right, that's the only play available in English. Although, I have heard of the play (or the movie), I have no idea what's the story of My Fair Lady is. This is my first. And I'm going to enjoy it. And I did. :)

When we finally get it, that's when the idea of clothes set it. Everyone looks like they came out of a fashion magazine. I actually packed a dress for such occasions. If I only knew! I feel like I'm going off to watch a movie rather than a play. Although, I can see some pips looking at my direction, I was thinking what better off to enjoy a show than in your most comfortable clothes... as long as you don't freeze. :D

There is just one uncertainty about the play: if it's in English or Italian. Alas! It's in Italian! My first musical play is in Italian! :D This is one is once again for the books.

I'm not a fan of the lead actress' singing (I've seen far greater singers in the Philippines) but her acting was very laudable and entertaining. Overall, the show was awesome, fun... and dream-like. Somehow, I felt like a little girl once again... the music and the singing reminds me of a lot of Disney movies... and I felt like singing “Do... a deer, a female deer... Re... a drop of golden sun... ” or “somewhere over the rainbow...”... not that it's any of My Fair Lady's songs.

Although, in Italian, one thing is for sure, “Fair” in My Fair Lady does not pertain to color. :D My #6 was indeed awesome... and the awesomeness I owe to the Man beside me. I was wrong again. He can indeed pull a surprise. And what a surprise! These are the moments that I can't help but be grateful for. He's a doctor in making daydreams into real memories. Thank you.

Now, moving on... aside from the Vatican (and our little detour), there are more to Rome... but we'll just have to rediscover the ancient city on my next entry. :)

Europe 102: Elusive Bronze Door

It's been a looong while since I wrote something about my Europe trip. It's a year ago that I had my trip but memories of it still lingers. I don't think that I will totally forget about this however, in any case, it's best to put it in writing. From Florence, we move further to the ancient city of Rome. :)

Let me just have a little introduction... My little nieces just had their first communion last May... our little angels. I can still remember when I was a kid going through the same thing with white dresses and feeling like graduating on a different level. During the month of May, we celebrate the Flores de Mayo season (translated as Flowers of May, for the feast of the Lady of Fatima). It is usually at this time of the year that first communions are being conducted but not entirely only that. Some cities or towns have grand celebrations with all the “reyna elenas” and “reyna emperatriz” marching with gowns and crowns and flowers for this celebration. Aside from these celebrations, for us kids, we have another sort of gathering. For Catholic kids in our community, we have like a summer school without the exams.. :D Kids from all ages gather to learn basic Catholic catechism like stories from the bible, reciting prayers, and of course sing gospel hymns. I particularly like the last one... but note that I'm not a singer, just a sing-er (i.e. sing whatev-er). And since it is summer school break and almost every kid is there, we were able to play fun team games after session... not video or computer games but pure traditional Filipino games with sticks, tin cans, slippers, and a big place to run around and sweat like crazy... however, this is not my point.

My point is that, the Philippines has always been rooted to its Catholic religion and traditions. The Christmas season is even more unique here in the Philippines that we have what we call “Misa de Gallo”, a dawn novena mass nine (9) days before Christmas. This reminds me that I have to wake up super early tomorrow to get in time with the Misa de Gallo mass at 4:30am. So as a Catholic, the idea of Europe is usually attached to visiting some of the holy places like the Vatican. You can say that every Filipino Catholic (or every Catholic for that matter) would want to have a pilgrimage to this place. As a Catholic girl myself, I couldn't help to include it in my to-do list (see #8). And when I told my mom that I will be able to visit the Rome (and Vatican), I think that seals the deal for my Europe trip... more like seals-the-deal-with-God-bless-you-kid permission.

St. Peter's Basilica and square.

Aside from Spain, Rome is the most popular European city for Filipinos. Here, people would definitely recognize even its Italian name, Roma. As much as I am excited to see the Vatican City, I'm also excited on what the rest of the Rome offers. Of course, the priority is still the Vatican (again, #8 in my to do list). As much as I was sad leaving the fashionable city of Florence, I was also excited to get into the Rome bandwagon.

Trains and Metro... and Filipinos

The trip from Florence to Rome just took almost 2 hours... (even less the time it takes to travel from Zamboanga to Ipil)... during these train trips, we spend it on reviewing the possible places to go to, playing games, and figuring out how to find our apartment. During our planning stages, I was a bit worried about arriving in Rome at night... well actually, in any places that I've never been to. But since I have someone with me, that made it less worrisome... and this is Rome, what could get wrong? (that rhymes!) :)

Anyways, we arrived at Roma Termini and look for our station on metro bus ride... we took our tickets from the ticket machines and move on... it was the first terminal that I've seen that looks more like a mall outside the train rails. On the other hand, the metro bus feels more like the MRT in Manila with less crowd... well, more like the train station in New York that you've seen from the movies. With our luggage tucked with us, we find the bus for our stop, and move with the crowd to get into the ride... and the first language that I've heard from inside the bus was... Filipino. I heard it because they are the only ones talking. Well, we love to talk in general.. comfort rooms, airport terminals, grocery stores, and buses are no different. Small world, indeed. So, it's inevitable that I looked around and there I saw a group of Filipino workers going home from work. I think two of them looked my way with a smile and a question in their eyes “Is she a Filipina?”... a smile back from me acknowledge that. That point, I felt a little home. When people started to get off the bus, I find myself sitting next to one of them. We had a small talk, what brings me there and what brings her there. She is a mother from Batangas going home to her apartment from work. She was working for years already in Rome and I can sense from her voice that she misses her family. I have only been in Europe for more than a week, and during these times I'm more engrossed in going through from one place to the other but at that moment, my heart missed my family back home. When we got off the bus, I shove that melancholy moment out and get back to the reason why I was there, i.e. to experience Europe... as a Filipina. And besides, I have to collect as much stories and experience as I can to be able to share it with my family and friends back home. They will not forgive me if I just went to Europe and cry my heart out missing them. And I don't intend to do that. Not in Rome.

Strong man...and Italian police

We walk on that night to find our apartment... good thing it wasn't that hard to find it. The hostess warmly greeted us and tour us around the place. But the interesting demonstration was the door. It was one of those big hardwood doors with big keys. Sorry, that's the only description I can give with this door. But she made it sound complicated that it's important that we know the tricks. It's so important that she even have to see us practice opening the door. My partner did it and after a successful first shot, in an admiring tone she looked at me and said “You're a lucky girl, you have a strong man.” I just looked at him... smirked.. superman successfully opened the door.. now, this adds up to our list of inside jokes. :D I tried opening the door myself but to no avail (maybe once, I was successful)... I was lucky after all... so, when you travel to Rome, make sure that you have a “strong” man with you or you are as strong as a man :D.. Rome has crazy big doors, you don't want to find yourself locked out of your apartment.

Anyways, moving on... since our place is just a stone throw away from the Vatican... we decided to have a walk on St. Peter's Square. It was already late, around 10pm, so there wasn't much people around... and you can really see the HUGE basilica to yourself. I'm still out-of-reality hazily wandering my eyes around the square. Gosh, I am stepping on St. Peter's Square. The only time that I usually get to see this place if there are news from the Vatican like the interment of Pope John Paul II or the election of the new Pope. They always show this place as a backdrop in their news and now here I am. After a few walks around the square, my daze and wonder was interrupted by an Italian police car telling us that the square is closed. The square is closed?! That was a bit disappointing. Note to self, Italian police are not charming at all.

Pizza... Pizza... and... Rissoto

One of the things that I love about traveling is the food, of course. And since I'm in Italy, it's super common that you get to taste their list of standard pizza. I was trying to remember the names of these pizzas but the one that just struck me was, Fungi. Unfortunately, my stomach was not in the mood. I guess, it was fed up with all the different kinds and amount of cheeses that I consumed. There was even a pizza that just contains 4-layer of cheese on it. My stomach just needs a breather. So on our first night, we just looked for something familiar, and there I met Risotto. It was so tasty that I forgot all the pizza that I've tasted. Maybe one day I'll get my hands on doing this... and also Ribollita. Good idea for Christmas. :)

Trail of the Bronze Door

Mission: To get this ticket for the Papal audience

Back in the apartment and after walking through St. Peter's Square, I was already eager to already check my to-do list related to Rome, and I just realized that it's just #8. Since the basilica is just nearby, this one is easy. While browsing on what to do & see in Rome, I remembered that the Vatican have Papal audience every wednesday. I never really place this on my to-do-list because it might not be so easy to just get in and see the Pope. And true enough, the website states that you should make reservations at least 2 weeks before and we only have 2 days before the Papal audience. But since we are already there, we just have to take the chance if we can get any tickets. So our journey to the bronze door began.

The very next day, we just went to the Information office of the Vatican to ask where we can get a tickets for the audience. She just mentioned to get into the bronze door. We're not so sure if she means a colored bronze door or a door made of bronze. I just thought that maybe Europeans just have a more fancy name for color brown because I was sure it's not the latter. So we passed the security check, look around St. Peter's square once more and could not see any door that looks like an entrance except the door to the basilica. We then, choose to enter into the basilica.

Moving around the basilica, we did not find any bronze door. The only door that we found was a huge brown door but it's locked and doesn't looked like it's an entrance to anything. (On a side note, the basilica is super duper huge. More on this on my next entry). We asked one of the guards where's the entrance to get the ticket to the Papal Audience, and he mentioned that it's the “bronze door” outside with the Swiss guards. Again, the bronze door.

So we went out and immediately outside, on the side of the basilica was a gate guarded by the Swiss guards. The look on these guards totally says No Entry to civilians. Although, there are some quite a number of tourists nearby, they are taking pictures of the of the guards rather than there to get some tickets. And there doesn't seem anyone else whom you can imagine asking questions about a ticket, other than the guards. Well, there's no harm in trying. So I went ahead to the direction of the gate... imagine, me walking alone on a clear street to the gate with a lot of eyes looking at me like “where the heck is she going?”. True enough about the No-Entry-look, immediately one of the guards met me a distance from the door and asked what I wanted. The same statement that I've asked before, i.e. where's-this-bronze-door-where-I-can-get-the-ticket. He mentioned the gate on the other side of the column. It was only after that I realize, the gate they were guarding was the actual entrance to the Vatican compound.

Our final pitstop for the quest of the bronze door.

Anyways, we moved on looking for that elusive bronze door. There we saw another metal gate, light blue in color with a pair of swiss guards. This time, they look more “friendly”. So, I just asked the same question. One of them, asked me how many will I need and I just said 2. He said wait and went to the guard house cubicle to get something. He gets back bringing 2 tickets and just told us to be on that same gate an hour before the specified time to get better seats. And I was like, “That's it? This is the bronze door?” I was more surprised of finding how the bronze door really looked rather than having the tickets on my hand. :D Going through all that, it was both not-easy and easy to get the tickets. Well, maybe the latter, if you know where the bronze door is.

In the end, it's mission accomplished. Next is to know what's beyond the bronze door. :)

My Wish

Just a few days ago, I came to the realization that Christmas is less than a 100 days from now. You see, we Filipinos love Christmas so much that we do a countdown and usually starts at 100. Why? I don't know. But when the month starts to hit the -ber months everything just talks about the coming holidays.

Well, this year is quite different. Our city is in conflict and the signs of Christmas seems so far away. If there's something that's good about what is happening is that it made the people closer to God and made the people more united as ever. I think the strength and resilience of people appears in the most trying times. During this conflict, my first thoughts and concern were the children and the youth particularly, my students. And if I have a wish for Christmas, I wish that the young ones will be enlightened and choose a different course to finding peace. A course that is free of violence and an understanding and respect for differences.

I wrote some of my experiences and exclusively share it to my students. I don't plan to post it in this blog but, a former student of mine request that I post it. And if she wants to, maybe some others would also want to. So here goes...

Hello, guys! I just like to share a few experiences and thoughts with you. This is especially address to you as young Zamboanguenos and Filipinos.

When I was very young, it was the very first time that I saw a strong fear in my mother's eyes. I can feel how much she tried to be strong but I know that there's something wrong. Later on, I happen to know that one of the leaders of the same group have escape and the authorities have located him just a stone throw away from our house. Still, I don't understand it. When I was a teenager about the same age as you are, the same people hostaged a group of people as human shields. Again, I remembered my mother's fears through these people's eyes. At that time, I already understand that it is pure oppression for everyone to see. For a long time after that, we have been peaceful. Until monday. If you can see, it has been a cyle. The same group of people. And worst is that they are not from here. They don't have families here, their jobs are not here (if they do have a job), they haven't walked the streets that you walk on everyday going from your homes to school and vice versa.

Now, you have seen and most especially experienced how these can all change with just a few people who force their agenda. We can have different ideals but these are personal ideals not necessarily for everyone else. Democracy is not just being able to speak out your mind or having the freedom to do things. It's about upholding each and everyone's rights and being equal. As well as having an environment in which the inherent human rights are upheld. That's why you cannot just burn houses (arson) or simply kill someone (murder). It breaks my heart that I see some of them are young, maybe same as your age. It breaks my heart because they haven't experience the joy of actually living.. they are rallying independence without knowing that they are independent and doesn't need to follow a dictator.. they are chasing peace without realizing that peace resides within their hearts only if they remove fear and hate.

I don't want mothers to have continues fear for their children and for children to experience this kind of fear. You are no more children, you can already think for yourselves. And with the technology, you have the things that will help you get informed, some might be true and some pretends to be true. You should learn how to discern it. I don't write this in my status because it's not for my friends but for you, my students. I want you to be enlightened. With this current experience, it's understandable to feel hate but let it not overtake love. Hate consumes you negatively, while love consumes others positively. 

Remember the city a few weeks ago... remember how happy you were during the socialization.. during the sports event or the cheerdance competition.. remember, the previous weeks when we bombard you with exams and assignments.. or the times when you just simply go out with friends and family.. that is freedom.. that is independence.. that's a taste of peace. I hope eventually you will understand this and that you don't want this to happen in the future. 

There's already too many negativity around us, it's time for some positivity. If you can, you can help our fellow Zamboanguenos who are currently displaced. You can ask your parents what you can do to help (through goods or just an extra helping hand). You don't need to go to grandstand, you can just go to the nearest evacuation centers. I think there you can more realize and uderstand fully what independence and peace means. If you can't, please hold on and pray harder for that end that we long for. The end when we get back to the class again for another lecture, another exam, another activity, and another recitation ;) I miss listening to your makukulit na voices. Soon! :)

God bless us all. 

#AlamNa

My 20-day challenge has finally ended.. (more or less).. now, I'm back to doing my normal work. It was both a crazy and fun experience.. and more sleepless nights.. but the company is worth it. As per request by SOMEONE, I'm posting here the message that I have given during the closing ceremony yesterday. Here goes...

It's been 20 days since we first met Mam Shelly and Sir Wax from Job and Esther Technologies. At that time, I was thinking that it was just like every other training that we've been through. Well, after 20 days, and an average of 18 hours a day.. there's no doubt of how important this training is, not just to us as participants but most especially to the future of game development in the city. And with all the media exposures (it actually feels awkward to watch yourself on TV) and the people that are gathered here right now, it's impossible to miss this huge weight of importance as well as opportunity.

I was asked, why did I get into this training. First and foremost, I was asked to do so by my boss. On the other hand, I said yes, because it's an opportunity that is hard to miss. Learning something new and innovative and most especially from the industry experts themselves is something that you don't get easily. This training helps us see what we can still improve on our graduates especially us who is inside the classroom. As an instructor, knowledge and experience that we have gained here will greatly help us in molding and motivating our students to be the IT professionals that the industry need. Getting into this training, it is inevitable that I will be with my former students. At school, I was their mentor, now, I consider them as colleagues. And while working with them, I couldn't feel more proud to watch how much they work hard and still maintain a good outlook in the midst of their struggles... and despite the haggard look. I remember, one of them mentioned, “this is like our software engineering subject again.. only you do it every day and every night”. s

To the participants, I hope that you will not only think of this as an opportunity for a job for you. But also an opportunity to open doors for the future graduates of our school and of the city. It is a great achievement and fulfillment to watch you, as you fulfill your goals and cheeses in life. You might not know everything yet but that doesn't prevent you from doing something new. To all the participants, your presence here is a testimony of your hardwork and endurance... as in great endurance. I hope that you will all continue to be motivated and to strive for excellence. As Sir Alvin mentioned, this is just the beginning, there's still more to come.

I also want to personally thank my boss, our department head. Thank you for allowing me and Danrie to participate here and for your continued support on our graduates. To see that this group actually compose the majority of our graduates, I know that you are doubly proud. Thank you, Mam.

The group would also like to thank Sir Wax. #Alam Na. Sir, thank you for the patience... the commitment... as well as the laughs. It made everything less hard. Thank you for inspiring all of us, in Equela-style. We wished that we were able to share with you more of the beauty of the city. But maybe next time (we hope(!) that there's next time).

To all the stakeholders, thank you very much for giving us, the graduates, and the city this kind of opportunity. Special shoutout to Mam Mau, Sir Louel, Sir Mike, Mam Marj, and the people behind the Zamboanga ICT Council. You all made this one happen. And I hope you will never cease to work on and achieve this mission as well as your higher vision for the IT professionals of this city.

Thank you very much. Muschisimas Gracias a todos! 

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Additional note: I am also very glad to have the opportunity to work with some new crazy people. :D All in all, it was an enriching experience both professionally and personally. Thank you, guys! :)

NOTE: #AlamNa is the expression that we used to convey something indirectly. It literally means "(you) know it already".

Cheesy Day

Yesterday was a busy day. And today is also busy... and cheesy. We were tasked to read a story on "Who Moved My Cheese?" and relate to the characters in the story. It's been a while since I read a story from cover to cover. I don't want to do anything that is half-hearted, so I really get into it, especially if it's required to write and express my thoughts. That's why I can't still finish my pending Europe blog... I didn't really have the right moment to really get into it.

So writing about this particular story made me missed a lot of things... I missed the times when we had to look for ways on how to create programs without having computers... I missed the times we lined up in the ATM machine with my fellow classmate scholars to get our allowance... I missed the times I had with my ex-housemates... I missed the times when I had to sleep under my office table to finish the development on time... I missed the times I had with my girl friends who have their own families & career to focus on... I also missed the times when I can freely share these ideas, thoughts, and feelings in a series of threads to a friend... regardless of time zones.

This story made me ponder on these times... so, this is what I wrote:

Out of the 4 characters in the story, I could very much relate to the character of Haw... not that I am Haw, it's just that I'm not Hem (not totally). Though, I can understand the feeling of Hem, however, in general, I am the more optimistic type of person. I grew up with less privileges than most, so I learned to adopt to the ropes of life. Resourcefulness is my first lesson. I relate myself to Haw because some of the situations that he has experienced, I also experienced myself. And the doubts that he had, I also had with me.

Looking back on my past experiences. There are a lot cheeses and Haw moments. I graduated in a way that most will say with flying colors, therefore, so much is expected of me. Like everyone else who graduated, we have such huge dreams... a big nice house, having your own office (with your own minions) and a lot of money... well, and sometimes part of that dream is a prince charming.

I'll tell you about the little cheeses along my way... My first job was a teacher... I just took that job because I need a setback for a while. Earn something before I moved to bigger heights. I enjoyed it, something that I actually didn't expect. After a semester, an opportunity opened. I got to be able to work in a software development company that is based here in the city. During this time, I tried to get as much cheeses of experiences that I can get. Since our client is in Manila, logistics favors us to also move there. It was not an easy decision since I'm really attached to my family, but it's something that I feel I should do to get to that main cheese. We had a great team, some of which are even my former students. I grow, as a professional and as a person, with them.

However, things change as we already know. I can observe that changes is happening but I didn't do anything at the beginning. One thing that is holding me back was the people that I worked it. I see these people grow and now I'm leaving them there. And letting go is something that is not easy. But change is something that you yourself should act on. I was unhappy, therefore, I need to move on. One of my greatest fear was that “what will people say?” “will they think I was failure?” I realized that I was thinking more of them rather than of me. And I realized further that the dreams that I made was the “generic” dreams of most people, especially those who are still starting out on their journey. I'm not saying it's wrong, but it can be a good starting point in the maze.

When, I got back, a project that is bigger and more social-oriented awaits me here. Again, something that is unexpected. We get to develop modules for the out-of-school youth... we get to teach students that have never touch nor seen a computer. These projects also include some travels. I get to see places that I have never been before. I was thinking ,“Why wasn't I able to do this when I was in Manila? Where every other places in the Filipinas will be accessible?”. Simply because I was busy and consumed with my current cheese that I was afraid to loose it. My perspective of cheese changed. Instead of looking at the more material things, I was able to find fulfillment in the achievements that I see in other people because of me. No matter how little it is.

So, did I finally get my cheese? A big house? Well, I have my own room now... with my own bathroom. My own office? I have my own table... and my own laptop. My minions? That's easy, I have my students. Money? Well, I don't have money... not as much money as I imagined. But my money is not the reason that I gain more friends... nor it is the reason of the knowledge and skills that I have now.. it didn't gain me my bosses' trusts. I don't have much money... but (not to brag) I was able to be an audience with the Pope (Benedict)... experience snow... walked with my boots on the cobbled-street of Venice and Florence... AND ate different kinds of actual cheeses... lots of it... more cheese than I ever ate in my entire life. And mind you, I even witness how to make an actual cheese.

Well, I still have fears. But it's not anymore holding me back from making decisions that are new to me... i.e. from discovering more cheese. And I believe that this training will be one of those big cheese. But unlike Haw, now, I have people who will made that journey with me along this current maze.

This I heard from a speech: There is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. That pot of gold that you will see in front of you are the gold coins that you picked up on that journey at the end of the rainbow.

What is your big cheese now?

HBD 2013

Birthdays seem to be the toughest day to ponder on... the weird thing about it is that you really don't know exactly how to act and what to do... except by default: say thank you to all those who greets you... accepts gifts to those who gives and say thank you... and then, prepare food. About 2-3 years back, its only my mother (with the help of my brothers & sisters) who prepared the food for my colleagues and friends... now, I personally prepare the food myself, the main reason is that I want to learn how to cook... so all the food I prepared is not always an assurance that it's good except my mother's suman. The preparation can be exhausting, on the other hand, it kept you from thinking "Oh my God, I'm a year older again!" :D

The past year was truly a blast.. and I mean, Katy Perry kind of fireworks. A lot of things happened that I never even thought possible or even wished for. Through the years, I just learned to not wish on what I don't have and what I don't have control over... rather, I learned to be grateful of God's everyday blessings manifested through my experiences and the people close to my heart.

I personally want to thank my teenhood friends (Mon, Nashra, Cherry, Charm, Mg, Marsh, Babe, & Lynette), ex-Omeds (Lee, Paul, Shims, Fats, Faith, Luisa, Mike, Nor, Joy, & others), you girls/boys will forever be part of my life. To mam Mayci, you knock my head when it needs knocking, you are not just a friend but you are my sister from different parents. Also, special thanks to my boss, mam Ciel, for the trust you continue to give into my work & for supporting my "other" life. :D

To my beloved sisterettes (Marisa, Melody, Lorie), thank you for putting up with a brat like me all these years. You are 3 of the strongest women I know, and I always and will always look up to you. We might sound like the 4 malditas but you help held the family together. And to my bros (too many to mention), thank you for being tough for the family and for still having deep compassion in your hearts.. maybe less on the beers next time. And this thank you extends to your kids and deserving wives.

This day is not possible without my strong-willed-super-compassionate mother, who brought me into this world just by peeing. Thank you, Momsy! Thank you for always protecting me from siblings food squabble, cooking, and most importantly laundry! And most of all thank you for supporting me even if you are scared of the decisions I made & still make. We were never rich in money but I never felt poor. You teach us to live a simple life but rich in relationship with people and with God. If I can wish for something, I wish and pray that God will continue to give you good health... as well as all the people surrounding me.

And a final special shout out to the one at the other side of the globe, thank you for lighting the first candle for my birthday... and for some other things. ;) You are the sweetest thing ever! Please reserve that candle and more candles for future candlelight dinners. I look forward to more moments of us together.

Thank you everyone, from A to Z! :)